(Jude, Age 2, our Carrboro apartment, 2007)
Jude has been doing this funny thing lately where he closes himself in the laundry area and looks out the window. He has always had a penchant for peace and quiet. When he was littler (see above) he would crawl into the cabinets and shut himself in only to giggle and sit quietly in their dark insides. Now that he is almost 7 (!!), I usually see a flash through the kitchen and notice the door just as it is clicking closed right around the witching hour of dinner-cooking-Ambrose-dancing-baby-screaming-6-o-clock. I love that he has found a corner that he can feel is his own. The Laundry Room is a place where he can collect his thoughts and have some peace. I have closed the door on that back room myself a few times since the brood got bigger. It is a nice little haven.
(Jude, age 6.9999999, our Laundry room, Nashville, TN, 2012)
We started the "countdown" of "Jude's-hours-left-as-a-6-yr.-old" on the way home from school today. And all evening I have been watching him let the whole idea settle. I love how he really thinks on things. He has always been this way. Ideas really sink in for him and I can actually "watch" him carry them around and turn them over and over again as he processes what he heard or saw throughout the day. It is a really cool thing to watch. He is quiet, thoughtful, and sometimes seems completely aloof. And yet nothing is ever lost on his little mind and he always surprises us later by sharing a reflection or making a remark that proves he was not only listening with his ears but also with his heart. We read earlier this week in school about how St. Benedict calls us to listen with the "ear of our heart". Jude seems to do this instinctually, naturally, without effort. I am inspired by him as I watch and want to learn how to do it more myself.
Tonight, after letting him have a good while by himself in his secret "room", I quietly knocked on the door and asked if I could join him. He put his arm around my neck and pulled me towards the back window. We were watching the sunset and he pointed out a bright star-like planet stuck in the middle of the sky, smack in front of our faces. "See!" he said. "It is my Birthday Star set out just for me on the Eve of my Birthday!" There was no explaining this idea away for him. It was just plain fact. When I said something about it being a planet his assurance and delight only doubled, "A whole planet!" and then in a happy whisper, "wow."
And again I delight in his instincts : to look out on something beautiful that God has put out in the night sky and see it as a gift, particularly and lavishly given, a bright and sure sign that God is loving and rejoicing in the simple fact that you exist (Jude) and that it is your birthday. And I feel that. All the time I do. Happy Birthday Little Jude.



















































